Dear Santa

I have been a very good boy this year. I have only chased down two cars which beeped at me and slapped one van which drove too close. I have fallen off once, but the cobbles really were exceptionally greasy and I did not swear even though I bent a pedal and broke a brake lever.

So for Christmas this is my list, and please tell Rudolph the extra mince pie is for him because carrots must get very boring after the first few thousand:

Sets of working indicators for all BMW drivers;
Relocation of manholes from corners;
Tyres that don't puncture on glassy cycle paths;
Simple due consideration.

I'm sure you won't see this as asking too much, Santa, but if it's not going to be possible then some new pedals and a brake lever would do.

.anth