.an embarrassing admission

OK, I'd better own up. I'm really quite embarassed about this. I didn't want to tell anyone, but these things soon get out of hand and everyone begins to notice. I didn't want to be shunned by my fellow cyclists as I know it isn't the sort of thing you admit to in polite society. But I have to own up. Please don't tell anyone else; I have got an STD.

I should have noticed sooner. I was feeling unmotivated, lethargic even. Getting on the bike wasn't the inspiration it usually is and something didn't seem right. And that was just the start of the symptoms. Little niggles, a feeling of dissatisfaction. The comfort of sitting on a perfectly adjusted machine had gone. Things, how shall I put this, weren't working quite right.

Maybe a new saddle would be good? A new saddle can often be a solution for folk with this kind of affliction. Especially one of those expensive ones with fancy ergonomic design and modern materials. Just the ticket. Or maybe something like new shorts would help. They are supposed to be specially medicated these days to prevent all sorts of conditions. Maybe something else is needed. Am I really getting to the source of the problem.

Yes, I hear you. I know there are places I could go and sort this out. Places where they would ask no questions, you get what you need and that is the problem dealt with. Where an expert could advise me on exactly what I could do. For a fee of course. I couldn't imagine not going private. I could even do it online. And no-one would notice. Except maybe my wife. If she finds out I have had to treat this sort of problem without talking to her first, then she'd have my guts for garters.

So there we have it. I am resolved to deal with this problem. I could quite easily. A mouse click. A slight diversion to go past the very door behind which lies a remedy for my ailment. But somehow I don't want to. I mean, have you seen the sort of people who frequent such places? Have you? Do you think I really want my face known by them?